So a fish with a penis on its head walks into a bar…

We don’t know where we’re going with that one, but a new species of fish with a penis on its head sounds like a joke, right? According to National Geographic, the Phallostethus cuulong is a tiny fish from Vietman with genitalia placed right near its mouth. It’s like a two-for-the-price-of-one deal. These guys can eat and mate all in the same area. Every man’s dream!

Believe it or not, there’s actually a species of fish called Phallostethus, or “penis chest”, but this Vietnamese species sets itself apart with the specific positioning of its manhood. The best news is that the female fish also have their genitals located in the same area, so no fish feels weird about mating head-to-head.

There are a lot of unanswered questions surrounding this evolutionary head-scratcher, but one thing’s for sure: we need to figure out how to rig evolution and get a penis on our heads. Since we already think with the one in our pants, it would only make sense.

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