Riding someone's bumper never makes them go faster... usually the opposite in fact. Case in point:

I had some jerk on my way to work, ride my bumper for about two blocks before finally passing me, all the while weaving in and out of traffic. This took place just pass the Salvation Army.

I'm trying to be better about my road rage for 2019, so I just smiled and continued on my merry way, although keep in mind, I was already going about 5 MPH over the posted limit myself, but anyhoo...

I watched as the driver ran the stoplight on Yellowstone and McKinley, only to get stopped at the next one on 1st Street anyway. At this point, I decide to do a little experiment.

He/She turned on to 1st Street, still speeding. They're a good two stoplights ahead of me at this point. As the light changed, I observed them swerving through the morning traffic, still doing a good 10 MPH over the limit. I'm doing the exact posted speed now, just out of curiosity.

He/She ran the light on David Street (right by the police station) and started riding this older ladies's bumper. Much to my delight, the lady starts doing roughly about 15 MPH.

I caught up to the driver at the intersection of Ash and 1st Street, because the older lady slowed down and so did the person in the other lane (which was priceless in my humble opinion). When I pulled up next to them at the light, I could almost literally see the smoke coming off their head from the tinted windows of their ginormous SUV. I looked over, paused for effect, and then busted out laughing, extremely hard and loud. Then I casually rolled right on past them as they waited for the lady to start moving again at the now green light.

Karma is a beautiful thing. It's even better when you get to witness it firsthand. I've been in a jovial mood all day because of it.

The lesson for the day, kids: don't be an a**hole driver.