We swore we were not going to tell these joke when we grew up. But then, we grew up.

We used to tell dirty jokes, but then, we had kids. Can't tell those jokes around the kids.

Okay, fine, but we are not going to lose our sense of humor, are we?

Then, one day... we hear ourselves telling a joke that our father told and we hang our head in shame. We just told a groan-worthy "dad joke."

Well, this is who we are now. We see our son looking at us, and we know that expression. He is thinking, "I'll never tell a dad joke, I swear." You just wait kid, it's coming.

HERE ARE THE TOP 20 DAD JOKES OF ALL TIME- the ones we swore we would NEVER tell. Special thanks to Country Living Magazine.

"Dad, did you get a haircut? No, I got them all cut!"
"My wife is really mad at the fact that I have no sense of direction. So, I packed up my stuff and right!"
"How do you get a squirrel to like you? Act like a nut."
"Why don't eggs tell jokes? They'd crack each other up."
"I don't trust stairs. They're always up to something."
"What do you call someone with nobody and no nose? Nobody knows."
"Did you hear the rumor about butter? Well, I'm not going to spread it!"
"Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself? It was two tired."
"Dad, can you put my shoes on? No, I don't think they'll fit me."
"Why can't a nose be 12 inches long? Because then it would be a foot."
"This graveyard looks overcrowded. People must be dying to get in."
"Dad, can you put the cat out? I didn't know it was on fire."
"What time did the man go to the dentist? Tooth hurt-y."
"How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh? Ten tickles."
"What concert costs just 45 cents? 50 Cent featuring Nickelback!"
"How do you make a tissue dance? You put a little boogie in it."
"Why did the math book look so sad? Because of all of its problems!"
"What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Nacho cheese."
"What kind of shoes do ninjas wear? Sneakers!"
"How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together."

BONUS JOKES! Check out this post by It's A Southern Thing. They asked their readers for their best Dad Jokes and got some real groaners.

"Why didn't the lifeguard save the hippie from drowning in the ocean? He was just too far out, man."
- Kitty Spruill

"Dad: why couldn't the skeleton jump off the roof? Son: I don't know. Dad: he didn't have the guts to!"
- Karen Davis Addison

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